Category Archives: Vents, Rants and Tirades

Sick and Tired and Angry and Why

An “Uber”-MiMi Milestone!


For those of you unfamiliar with my story, please click here.

For everyone who has helped me get places and things since I got ill, I want to preface this by saying a HUGE THANK YOU!!!

If you know me at all, you know that I am/was ferociously independent. I am used to doing things on my own. So much so, I really do NOT like asking for help. I still feel like I should be able to be independent and I have a hard time admitting I am disabled. But the truth is I am, and I’m gonna have to get over it.

I guess.

Today marks a day of triumph for me. I took my first independent trip out of the house since my aneurysm rupture. I pretty much had to because I needed stuff, and I couldn’t wait for someone to become available to come get me.

I was told about Uber by a few folk, but I was apprehensive for a myriad of reasons. Most of which were probably fears fabricated in my broken brain. Those fears were outweighed by my need to get to the store.

But, I am rambling, I do that.

My bad.

I finally used my first free trip on my Uber account.

And where did I go?


I know, it’s kinda pitiful. Especially because Walmart is now a horrible experience for me because of the crowds and other “overstimulation” factors. (Noise, etc).

I am having insomnia issues, so I was up at three am. My broken brain said, “Aye you know if you go to Walmart early, it won’t be as crowded.”

So I did.

Uber is a life-saver. The drivers were so nice. I found out they like their “jobs” because they are their own bosses. If they don’t want to work one day, they simply do not turn on the Uber App. It’s a safer than being a cab driver because they don’t carry cash, (it’s all done through the app. And for the most part they can pick and choose what areas they want to drop off and pick up folk.

Both drivers I dealt with were relatively new with the company. They seemed to have one common issue.

The drunk people can be…well, use your imagination.

The cost, you ask?

Let’s put it this way.

My trip TO Walmart was FREE, because I used a promo code.

My trip back was roughly $11.

I dunno if that’s considered expensive or not, but when you consider I was picked up in under ten minutes by smiling happy people and I didn’t have to rush, to me it was $11 well spent.

Yes, I will use them again!!!

Oh and if YOU want to use them and get a free ride worth $20 hit me up, I have a promo code!!! Plus I’ll get another free ride too!!!

Not for nothin, if you’re lookin to make some extra money, I’d contact them to see what you need to do. Seems like a sweet deal to me.

I am proud of myself.

And once I do some finagling with my finances, I may actually be able to get out more.

Do things.

Visit people.

I am happy.



Quick Thought 7/27/15


Considering the current reputation of the media in Amerikkka, I can only hope the hashtag #theemptychair was created with the noblest of intentions for us victims and not to distract us from other truths.
Otherwise we are being raped again…publically.




The Diametric White Chick Who’s Pissed


Malcolm X… [was] approaching a building with three of his associates when a young white woman momentarily blocks his path and asks what she, as a white person, can do to help his cause. Malcolm tersely answers with one word — “Nothing” — and passes her by. (

I have put off writing about the Michael Brown tragedy because I honestly felt anything I wrote would sound trite or redundant. Because of my health , I unable to fly to Missouri or even cross the bridge into Philadelphia and peacefully show my support. Because of my financial situation, I am unable to donate money. So what can I do? This question haunted me like the quote above. I was afraid that my answer was also nothing.

Then I realized that I, in fact in the past have done something. It may have been a small something, but it wasn’t nothing.

That is why I miss teaching so much. Because I was an English professor, my job was to instruct my students to write essays to preparing them for further college assignments. When it came to teaching the argumentative essay, I would typically use current events to capture the attention of my students making them more engaged about what they were writing. I started was a professor from 2008-2012 and unfortunately, then and now there have been a plethora of events to write about.

What was apparent to me that most, if not all, of my students black or white knew very little, if anything, about these events. It was also horrifyingly disturbing that if anyone did have knowledge of the murders most of them were apathetic. I didn’t dare bring up Mumia Abu-Jamal or the MOVE bombing, because most of them weren’t even born yet, so they would be even more apathetic if that was possible. It was infuriating because:

A-I have two interracial children; this affects me.

B-Because of how and where I was raised, most of my friends are African-American; this affects me.

C-At one of the campuses in which I taught, the racial makeup of my students was predominately African-American and Hispanic; again, this affects me

It wasn’t unusual that one or more my students would ask me with either confusion or defiance:

Why do you care?

My answer would restate the above, and then I would add:

Because, I am a diametric white chick, and for those who asked that question your argumentative essay assignment is why you don’t care.

After the gasps, I swear one could hear a rat pissing on cotton in my classroom.

Because of my health incident, I was put out on disability shortly after that, so I never read those essays.

If anyone bothered to write them.

~Love is Eternal~

True Blood Tidbits (Season 7 Episode 3) **spoiler alert**


  1. Mocking Mooji is NOT funny (thumbs down)
  2. SARAH NEWLIN?!?!?!? Why is this bitch ALIVE!!!??
  3. LMAO @ St.FuckinPetersburg…oh PAM, I heart you
  4. Vampires who speak French are sexy.
  5. WHYYYYYYYYYY does Sookie keep runnin and hidin shit from ALCIDE?!?!? If she don’t want him sheeeeeeeeeeeeit. Do you know what I would DO with ALCIDE?!?! That hoe is STOOPID!!!
  6. I have to live with the memories of what I’ve done to you forever. I can’t acquit myself of any of it-Bill. Now see even a dead person has more feelings than a sociopath. WTF?!!
  7. Jason’s vampire…I’m just waiting for her to bitch slap him…lol
  8. Ok the Sookie whiny monologue made me wanna scratch my eyes out.
  9. Everything that’s behind us is fuckin useless-LaLa aint say nuffin but the TRUTH!!! And it always fuckin was.
  10. OK here’s where the hoe redeems herself and made me cry…the fall wasn’t the worst part…it was THE WAIT…yeah her fae ass can hear my thoughts too
  11. Did anyone else wanna knock Bill out of the tree? No? Just me? Well aiight I have anger issues (see #10)
  12. They beheaded the fake Mooji??? Fuck Sarah.

It’s Not that I am Suicidal…

Inspired by Raphsodi


…but as I look at my bedside table, I notice I have an arsenal of medication that at any time I could swallow and pretty much not wake up. But I won’t. It’s not that I am a punk, trust me my little ass has survived more physical, mental and emotional abuse than the average person. I also survived a horrific life-threatening health condition, so I should be thankful and happy right? For the most part I am.

But today was one of those days. I actually was angry that I woke up, but I had a migraine that jolted me out of my sleep. Then I heard my youngest granddaughter crying, so I got up to care for her. She makes my whole day, but she is gone for the weekend. My daughter on her days off has a routine. She will sleep as late as she possibly can, get up, shower, get cute, take selfies and bounce. She will probably come home real late (if at all) and do the same thing tomorrow.

My very best friend lives in Maryland, but if it wasn’t for her I probably would NEVER leave the house except for doctors’ appointments. My sister works long and grueling hours, and Mom is in the same boat as me because she doesn’t have a vehicle. I have a car, but I can’t drive it because of my health, so it pretty much became my daughter’s vehicle. I wish she would give it my Mom more so her and I could hang out more often.

Invite people over you say? I used to. I used to be proud of my little bungalow. It’s tiny but it was clean and cute. Not so much anymore. My best friend and my cousin offered to come and give it a good scrub because I can’t clean the way I used to. I also don’t have the disposable income to buy food for myself let alone entertain friends, get a haircut, new clothes, ya dig?

THEN to add insult to injury, yesterday, I found out the “man” I have been seeing and in Love with for the past five years (or so) is NOT the man he portrayed himself to be. He actually is a narcissistic sociopath living at LEAST THREE different lives, keeps MANY women around for need only, and unfortunately I am his latest casualty. The only thing good that came of that situation is that I gave him NOTHING but my Love and sex. So in retrospect, both of them must be off the hook. That made me feel good for about five minutes, so I took my own selfie…lol. It came out pretty damn cute. So today, I was happy for fifteen minutes, tops.

July 21st I will have my third and hopefully last brain surgery. They are rerouting the blood flow in my brain so it doesn’t fill my other aneurysm which may cause it to rupture. But apparently, I am not supposed to worry about it because it’s not until next month. Oh okay, but since I am left all alone most of the time, I have nothing to do BUT think and worry. Pardon me that I am concerned about my own life.

And that last statement is why I won’t take the arsenal of pills by my bedside all at once, because I AM going to survive this. I AM going to get my life back, get a new apartment, and maybe even GET OUT more. Shit I may even meet a good dude or two or three who AREN’T mentally ill or look like mud ducks and go out on an actual DATE??? Do people do that anymore?? LOL.

So it’s not that I am suicidal, I just gotta dead and grieve my old life, so I can have a joyful rebirth.


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10 MORE Facts You Probably Don’t Know About Me but You Do Now (warning some explicitness)


  1. When I am pissed off, I will play Lil Kim’s Crush on You and most of her Hardcore album until I am ashamed of myself.
  2. The only reason I haven’t “blown up someone’s spot” is because I believe in Karma, and despite what I may say, I am not ready to die on July 21st or become worse than I already am.
  3. Apparently God wants me to frolic around in His Universe for a while too so I can spread my light around.
  4. My dark side, tho, is an evil bitch. Yeah you don’t really wanna meet her, ever.  Not only that, but no one has enough bail money.
  5. I crave peanut butter constantly. (protein issues maybe)
  6. I am the ULTIMATE ANTITHESIS of “you attract what you are”
  7. I attract sociopaths and emotionally damaged men.
  8. I am NOT as strong as I appear to be. Am I fighter and a survivor? Yes. Strong? Nah. Inside no one knows how much I hurt.
  9. Yeah, I’m completely in Love with a dead man who was a brilliant artist, heroin addict, and eclectic genius with a very large dick. (10 inches or more)
  10. I cannot and will not say the word cock unless it is followed by “a doodle doo”.

Okay…there may be more…later…probably…shit I didn’t feel like writing today but yeah anywho…

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