How to Skin a Sociopath: Icy Mint


Yolanda poured the last of the wine into Peyton’s oversized glass. The kids had been asleep for over an hour and the girls were having a good time.

“Peyton, where did you get these glasses? These are more like goblets.”

“I’m pretty sure I got them online during one of my retail therapy binges.”

“One of them? How many have you had?”

“Girl. Let’s just say it costs him every time I catch him in some shit.

They clinked their glasses together.

“You gotta do what you gotta do.”

“To be honest, Yolanda, I would sell all of my shit, all of it, if it meant my husband would be faithful to me. The shit hurts.”

“I know. Believe me.”

“That’s what I wanted to ask you. How can you still stay in your marriage knowing your husband is cheating? You said earlier you knew he was with some other woman. How do you do it? How do you keep your sanity? Do you know how tempted I am to call his superiors? Have them article fifteen his ass? But if I do that, they garnish his pay. And who suffers? Me. The kids. Is that how and why you keep calm?”

Yolanda chuckled and lit a cigarette. “I’m his wife. I do my best to encourage him. Sure babe, take that tour overseas. No I don’t mind that it’s in Thailand. Go. Experience life. Have fun. I’ll be here when you get back.”

She paused for affect.

“Not only will I be here when you get back, I will strap up your dick. Twice. Fuck the shit out of you then convince you to do this tour in Iraq, because we really need this money, babe. I really want to go back to school and to do that, I gotta to be able to afford to put the youngest in day care. It’s only for three months. Can you do this for us?”

Yolanda gaged the look on Peyton’s face before continuing. She seemed confused but that was better than upset.

“Then he goes away. And I patiently wait for his head to come back in a different box than his body, because being his wife, I am the beneficiary on all of his life insurance policies. He dies a hero and my kids and I get can smooth get the fuck up outta here.”

She watched Peyton go to her pantry, pull out another bottle of wine, open it and top off Yolanda’s goblet.

“So wait, that’s our future? Hoping our husbands die?

“Well, there is another option.”


The room was exactly a room. It was a huge walk in freezer in the basement of the garage at Dr. Swan’s estate. In that freezer completely naked and chained to the floor was Lance Corporal Jackson and Mariah. The freezer was completely covered in plastic from floor to ceiling. Jackson heard Mariah whimpering.
“Babe, try to calm down.”

“Babe my ass. Calm down my ass! My body has been butchered and I’m naked and wet in a fuckin deep freezer, Jackson. So fuck your calm ass!”

Everything became quiet.

Until they heard the chainsaws.


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