10-America? Really? Our so called “founding fathers” stole the country from the Native Americans, and because they were too lazy to take care of it, enslaved Africans to do it for them? So yeah I don’t celebrate thieves, kidnappers, murderers, rapists, and lazy slobs. I’ll pass.
9-Unfortunately where I am from, people purchase illegal fireworks and they sound like gunfire. If my kids were tiny, I wouldn’t let them outside. Shit is scary.
8-Red white and blue? There are too many wanna be gang members. Since, I don’t wanna be mistaken for one of their “wifeys”, I would have to wear white. Not only does white get dirty too quickly, but I would look like a gallon of milk. (I’m short and round).
6- Call me bourgeois, but I like my privacy at the beach. Unless you’re a cute dude with a cooler full of beer.
5-Flies near my food. I literally get ill.
3-Not everybody can make potato salad.
2-The drunk uncle at the BBQ who threatens people into playing dominoes then breaks the picnic table slamming them down, and the drunk aunt who wears no panties under her sundress, sings all the wrong lyrics to the songs and “drops it like it’s hot”
1-Bammas who either don’t throw shit away, or miss the trashcan, leaving you to do community service in your own backyard.
lil bohemian gypsy
Other bangs and booms